Types and Uses of Baby Slings

Slings are becoming increasingly popular in all regions of the world. They are worn around the body and can be adjusted to be worn on the hip as well as in many other ways. The idea behind the baby modern baby sling dates back o before the middle ages. Many parents used and are still using slings to easily travel with their children. One more reason why slings are popular is that the parent can perform other tasks while carrying the infant. Baby slings allow parents to maintain the baby in a safe and secure way as well as “keeping on eye” on the child while moving and performing tasks freely. The increased usability and versatility of baby slings have made them a popular gift for new parents especially at baby showers. Baby slings have become popular because of convenience and ease of use. They are also great for parents who do not have enough free time to spend with their children. Infants need constant monitoring and keeping the baby in a sling allows the parent to do so. Also keep in mind that carrying a baby in a sling is similar to the state the infant was sitting in the womb.
Slings are perfect for around the house as well. Parents can monitor their babies and do chores at the same time. When going for a walk or commuting by foot the sling is great because it is less cumbersome than a stroller or car seat. Due to their flexibility, baby slings have become a favourite and essential item with parents around the world.
Baby slings and baby carriers come in multitude of styles, colours and types. There are the wrap around slings that allow the baby to face forward; tummy to tummy, hip, nursing and kangaroo carrying position. Certain slings allow the infant to stay in the cradling position which is very comfortable for infants. Specifically, wrap around slings are worn over the shoulder and can often be fastened with a buckle or a knot. These types of slings are the most common and most popular type due to their flexibility. Usually slings are made of soft, hypo allergic fabrics. When made from cloths, the manufacturers make sure it is sturdy enough to hold babies of different sizes and weights. Even distribution of the baby’s weight is another factor sling manufacturers take in consideration; it s important to prevent injuries on parents. As mentioned above, some slings are adjustable to accommodate for growth and height of the infant.
When parents are looking to buy a sling, one of the questions they are often faced with is selecting between a padded or unpadded sling. Most parents like the padded types of slings because they provide extra support for the baby and at the same time does not take a strain on the parent’s shoulders. The downside of the padded sling is that they could be considered as too bulky and thus are less manageable when walking. In general however, different types of slings exist to accommodate for different life styles and preferences of the parent.

Understanding A Childs Fears And Anxieties

As a parent it is important that we understand what potential problems our child has. Most children have certain things that they worry about or even fear. In this article, I write about the types of fears that this might be and about how we can help our children to cope and to get through life in the best possible and stress-free way.

Many children are able to pick up on what their parents are worrying about. They may hear arguments about money and can then start to worry themselves about the financial situation their family may be in. I am a parent myself and try where possible to only discuss serious issues with my partner when the children are out or are asleep. If I believe that one of my children has overheard a conversation which I would have rather they hadn't, I then talk to them to attempt to reassure them that everything is OK.

Children may also worry that their parents may break up and that they will end up living apart. They will no doubt hear that this has happened to their friends and may wonder and stress about how their lives would change if this happened to them.

My children have told me that they worry and that they fear that one of their parents may die in the near future. It is quite difficult to explain to them that this is unlikely to happen as it obviously could. I try and laugh it off which may not be the best policy, by stating that I am still very young and that I have no plans to leave this planet in the near future. I explain to them the age that the average male will live to in our country and that normally, I hope, makes them feel better.

School can be another area of stress for some children. Will they be able to cope and understand the work? Will they be able to obtain a good examination mark and a good report? Will they be able to make their parents proud of them? I have told my own children not to worry about these issues and to just try their best.

Socialising and meeting friends can also bring its own tensions. Children make and break friends at regular intervals, especially during the early teenage years. When friends fall out this can be a very stressful time for any child. When this happens to my children, I make a point of saying that it has been the fourth time in a month that you and Amy as an example, have had a falling out. Your sure to make friends again in the near future.

As children get a bit older there is then the challenge of meeting a member of the opposite sex. We all know the problems and strains that this can bring. At this time I think it is just a matter of being there for your children and getting them through these difficult years the best and easiest way possible.

Understanding How The Internet Affects Children

Between surfing the Internet, visiting chat rooms and sending text messages, children spend a great deal of time in cyberspace-and it's up to parents to make sure their kids spend that time safely. Consider the following statistics:

• Approximately 90 percent of children ages 8 to 16 have viewed pornography on the Internet.

• Approximately 70 percent of sexual advances on the Internet happen while children use a home computer.

• Only 25 percent of children will tell a parent about an online encounter with a sexual predator.

• An alarming 75 percent of children willingly share personal information about themselves over the Internet in exchange for goods or services.

In addition, approximately 75 percent of online teenagers use instant messaging (IM). Why is this important for parents? Because 37 percent of online teens have used IM to write something they would not have said in person.

There are both personal and technological dangers associated with a child's Internet use. Not only might a child access Web sites containing inappropriate material, but sometimes the simple act of visiting a malicious Web site can cause spyware, worms or other digital threats to be downloaded and installed on your computer.

Protecting children should be a parent's primary concern. There are several ways to accomplish this. First, establish boundaries. Decide what Web sites and content you feel comfortable letting your children see, then take steps to filter or block everything else. You can find out what sites your children have visited by reviewing their Internet history.

Internet Explorer contains a feature called the Content Advisor that enables parents to control the Web content that children see. Similar to the "V-chip" found in many new televisions, the Content Advisor uses a rating system to help you set the level of language, nudity, sex and violence that is acceptable in your home.

These tips come from the free publication "A Parents' Guide to Internet Safety" developed by Geeks On Call-a national company providing on-site computer services. The Parents' Guide is part of an educational program called "Kids Club" created by Geeks On Call to teach children and parents about Internet safety and to donate money to local schools.

Understanding Video Game Ratings

As a parent today, you most likely understand the ratings on the movies that your children are watching. But, do you really know what the ratings on their video games mean? Are your children playing games on there video game systems or on the computer that are meant only for adults?

The Entertainment Software Rating Board has a very simple ratings system in place that we should know about. It is especially important to learn about the video game rating system, since most children can buy these games without a problem in many stores today.

EC – Early Childhood
This rating indicates that the game is suitable for ages 3 and up. Games that are rated EC contain no material that parents would find inappropriate.

E – Everyone
A game marked E is suitable for children 6 years and older. There may be minimal cartoon, fantasy, or mild violence and/or infrequent use of mild language.

E 10+ - Everyone 10+
Titles rated E 10+ have content that may be suitable for ages 10 and older. Titles in this category may contain more cartoon, fantasy or mild violence, mild language and/or minimal suggestive themes.

T – Teen
Games that are rated T have content that may be acceptable for ages 13 and older. This category may contain violence, suggestive themes, crude humor, minimal blood, simulated gambling, and/or infrequent use of strong language.

M – Mature
Titles rated M contain content that may be suitable for persons ages 17 and older. This rating may indicate intense violence, blood and gore, sexual content and/or strong language.

AO – Adult Only
Titles rated AO have content that should only be played by persons 18 years and older. Titles in this category may include prolonged scenes of intense violence and/or graphic sexual content and nudity.

RP – Rating Pending
Games listed as RP have been submitted to the ESRB and are awaiting final rating. (This symbol appears only in advertising prior to a game's release.)

As parents, we have the right to be informed about what our children are viewing. We also have the responsibility to keep ourselves informed, and keep our children away from content that is inappropriate for their age. I urge parents to stay up to date on any information about ratings in the future, and be smart when choosing games and software for your children.

Unhealthy Air in Schools: Building Materials Play a Role

Many children are being subjected to indoor air quality problems in their schools.

Oftentimes, these problems can be attributed to the materials used in constructing the schools, many of which provide a food source for mold.

Even with the best building design, moisture likely will be present in all schools at some point, so the choice in building materials is critical to reducing or eliminating the amount of damage caused by mold.

A new video produced by the National Concrete Masonry Association titled "Building Smarter Schools: Are You Making an Educated Investment?" calls attention to the issue of mold in school buildings and its cost to communities.

"In our area of Texas, there is an 18-month-old school that is abandoned and full of mold," said Chris Huckabee, chief executive officer of the architecture firm Huckabee & Associates and a frequent lecturer on high-performance school design. "This is obviously not popular with the taxpayers or the school administrators."

The video showcases schools across North America in which masonry construction was the solution to serious mold problems. Huckabee notes that all of the schools that his company has built -more than 1,000 - were built with masonry because mold will not damage it.

"Schools are landmarks in the community and we want them to stand the test of time," said Huckabee, who is featured in the video, along with school architects, a school superintendent and a facilities director for a large school division. All favor the use of concrete masonry in school construction because it is resistant to mold, wind and fire, durable, energy-efficient and easy to maintain.

Using a private tutor with your child

Your child’s school activity is falling behind other classmates, his/her grades aren’t high anymore, or your child is just not coping with teachers’ requirements. All these represent valid reasons for you to get a private tutor for the child. The private tutor will help your child with difficult homework assignments, will explain him/her different concepts or ideas, and will teach him how to study efficiently for tests.

If you hadn’t had a private tutor for your child before, it would be good to know what to bring to a tutoring session. Your child should bring the textbooks for certain subjects they will be studying, notes from classes, previous tests, assignments, workbook problems, class syllabus etc.

The tutoring activity is not the private tutor’s exclusive responsibility. In order for the tutoring sessions to be successful, you, as a parent, share a great deal of responsibility. You have to keep an eye on the child when he/she is not at school, to make sure he/she is studying enough. Parents, child and private tutor have to collaborate together for achieving best results. Therefore, here are some things you should do as part of your role.

Before the tutoring session you ought to make sure that your child is familiar with the material the private tutor will be working on. You should encourage your child to make a list of questions on things he/she didn’t understand during classes. Also encourage your child to ask questions whenever a problem arises. Instruct your child to share with the private tutor his/her preferred method for studying. Make sure the child is behaving respectfully towards the private tutor. And always supervise your child’s studying activity; make sure he/she is studying thoroughly.

Your child’s most important responsibility is to study. But, apart from this, he/she also has to retain himself/herself from doing some prohibited things. Here are the most common mistakes the tutored children are doing. Children expect and even ask the private tutor to do the homework for them. They start studying for a test when it’s too late and they don’t have enough time to learn. Or they ask for the private tutor’s help in case of a test when is too late. And, the worst mistake of all, they don’t study for the tutoring sessions, therefore the parent’s financial effort and the private tutor’s activity become useless.

In conclusion, the learning process is an effort that requires commitment on behalf of parents, students and private tutors. All these factors have to cooperate and act responsible for best studying results.

V-Chips Allow Parents To Control Children's TV Programming At Home

While parents want to protect their children from offensive or inappropriate TV programming, many don't know that the tools they need may already be right in their living room. Every TV 13-inches and larger built since 2000 contains a V-chip, which can block individual channels or programs depending on content. This technology lets parents, not broadcasters, determine what is appropriate for their children to see and hear on TV.

Most television shows now include a rating, as established by the broadcasting industry. The rating icon is displayed in the upper left hand corner at the start of the program and succeeding hours if the program is longer than one hour. This rating also is encoded into the programs, so the V-chip technology can read the encoded information and block shows according to parental presets. Using the remote control, parents can program the V-chip to block certain shows based on their ratings. Because programs are rated by episode, ratings may vary from week to week and be blocked accordingly.

To use the V-chip, follow the directions using the TV's on-screen menu. Each brand and model may have somewhat different procedures, but none is difficult. There also are written instructions in the owner's manual. The V-chip is activated by using a password or code. Any change requires the user to know the code, therefore children will not be able to change the settings.

Although cable and satellite set-top boxes have their own parental controls, each TV has its own so it's possible to block programs or channels even if the TV signal is received over the air. The V-chip also can be used to block uncut and unedited movies that run on premium channels using the MPAA rating system.

View from Another Planet: Learning to Talk to Our Children

Our goal in conscious communication is not to change the other person . . . Our goal is to establish connection.

Andrew LeCompte, author, Creating Harmonious Relationships

A parent of three attended a workshop I gave on managing conflict. A few days after the workshop, she emailed me to say that she'd had an "opportunity" to practice when her 15-year-old daughter came home an hour after the agreed upon time. As my friend put it, "I had an opportunity last night at home...and I blew it!"

A colleague, in talking about conflicts at home, once said “Our family really knows how to push our buttons – because they installed them.” I laughed because it was funny and because it is so true. It’s more difficult to deal with family conflicts, because the patterns we’ve created with each other are so entrenched.

Conflict Does Exist
What happens to you when conflict arises? If your reactions are typical of most of us, you either prepare for a fight or do your best to avoid the situation.

We’d all like to be better at conflict because we sense the potential it holds – to strengthen our relationships; to teach our children that conflict can be an opportunity to learn and grow; and to learn and grow ourselves.

If you're alive, you will have conflict from time to time. You can become more skilled at handling conflict and gain influence over the outcome by becoming aware of your conflict "habits" and changing the ones that are not useful or purposeful.

The Art of Listening
One time-tested conflict management skill is listening. The next time you get into a battle with your child, try asking for their point of view, listening, and paraphrasing what they said. Ask questions to which you really don't know the answer, then listen again. State in your words what you heard him say. Step off your point of view for a moment and be curious.

Imagine your child just arrived from another planet. If ET really did land near your house and you knew that he was a friendly soul, wouldn't you love to have an exclusive interview? You'd want to know everything, wouldn't you? Pretend you don't know anything about your child's perspective (you really don't). Stand or sit side by side and face the same direction. Try to find out what is really important. For example, parents and kids often fight over chores or homework, yet when we take time to find out what is at the base of the argument, it’s usually about responsibility, yours as a parent and your child’s as a maturing adult. From this place, it will be easier to talk about your mutual needs and concerns.

A nice byproduct of your aligning with them is that they may be more willing to see your position. Now it's your turn to share the view from your planet. Talk, listen, talk, and listen again. Keep both viewpoints in mind as you search for solutions. Even when setting or reinforcing limits, you can acknowledge your child's point of view and stand firm. "I understand that Kathy's mom lets her stay out that late, but you cannot." Avoid justifying and persuading.

Listening Does Not Equal Agreement
It's challenging to take the initiative to learn where our children are coming from, because we risk losing authority. Remember that listening does not necessarily mean agreeing. Being willing to consider their cause demonstrates empathy, understanding and the willingness to look for mutually agreeable solutions. Taking the time to listen and talk shows them you care, builds self-esteem, and gives them appropriate ways to handle troubling situations of their own.

"Oh well. Maybe next time I can get centered first," said my friend when we talked about the conflict with her 15-year-old. Reminding yourself to breathe and center before, during and after a conflict will have a beneficial influence on you and your child, while teaching your child a valuable skill. Be curious, listen and learn, and let your purpose be your guide. It may take two to tango, but it only takes one to change the dance.

Weaning A Breastfed Baby

When to wean is a question facing all breastfeeding mums. How does a new mum know when to introduce solid food into her baby's diet and what sort of food can a baby eat?

At present the World Health Organisation recommends that all babies be breastfed exclusively for six months. A long time, you may think, especially in the middle of a colic episode or growth spurt! However, there are real concerns for the welfare of babies that have led to this advice.

In the past many babies were fed solid foods at very young ages. It is now believed that their bodies were unable to cope with the demands this placed on them; a dramatic increase in the incidence of allergies and food intolerances meant guidelines were reviewed and altered.

The main danger that comes with introducing solid food too early is that babies may receive too much salt in their diets, leading to potential kidney problems in later life.

So, if you follow the advice of the World Health Organisation, you will see that it makes sense to put off giving food other than breastmilk for the first six months.

So how do you encourage a six month old baby to eat solids? The main thing to remember is that you should introduce solids gradually.

When your baby is ready for solid food he will begin to demand feeds more often, and may never seem satisfied for very long. He will start to take an interest in your meals and may even try to help himself! He will begin lip-smacking and chewing as he mimics you. A real sign that solids are imminent is the development of teeth.

Speak to a health-visitor if you think your baby is very hungry. If your baby is under six months you may find that he is just going through a prolonged growth spurt. If this is the case, his hunger will normally settle down after a few days when your milk supply has increased.

When your baby reaches the six month target, and you are sure that he is ready for solid food, try a teaspoonful of watery baby rice or baby porridge. Try to keep foods very bland and runny at the beginning.

Once he is used to solid foods, and is no younger than six months, you can quickly move onto adult cereals like Weetabix and Readybrek.

It is wise to only introduce one food at a time so that you can identify any intolerances or allergies. Sometimes these can take several days to take effect, so stick to one food for a few days before moving onto another.

Some babies are happy to have one solid feed a day at the beginning of weaning, whereas others require more frequent feeds. It is a good idea to offer the breast before and after each feed to maintain a good milk supply.

Cows milk and dairy products, eggs, fish particularly shellfish), nuts (especially peanuts), some fruits and foods containing gluten can all cause allergic reactions. So be careful with your choices...

From six months babies can digest protein so red meat, fish ,eggs, cheese, chicken and pulses can all be introduced.
Do not give peanuts to babies under one year old: if there is a history of allergies in your family avoid giving them for at least three years. As well a being an allergy hazard they can also be a choking hazard.

Honey should also be avoided for the first year as babies can contract botulism from it.

Eggs must be thoroughly cooked but can be introduced from six months.

Buy gluten-free baby food at the beginning of weaning, if possible, as gluten can cause coeliac disease. Usually a six month old baby can digest gluten without any problems but younger babies are more at risk.

Some babies react to citrus fruits such as oranges but alternative fruit juices can be given instead, such as apple juice.
Never add salt to food which your baby will eat. If he is ready to eat the same meals as the rest of the family do not add gravy until you have removed the baby's portion, as gravy can contain a lot of salt.

It is best to introduce savoury foods prior to sweet foods as babies very quickly develop a sweet tooth! They tend to enjoy pureed carrots, broccoli, sweet potatoes, turnip and parsnip and any combination of these foods. Babies also love stewed apples and pears or mashed bananas and strawberries!

However, many babies dislike potatoes at the beginning of weaning. When the baby is a little more experienced with tastes and textures you can start adding some potato to his meals.

Let the baby decide when he has had enough of any particular meal. Never force-feed the baby. He only needs a little bit of solid food each day. For some babies a few spoonfuls will be enough; for others a main course and dessert are required!
If he refuses to eat one type of food avoid it for a while and try something else. Return to the disliked food after a few days and try again. Some babies can be very fussy, whereas others eat whatever is placed in front of them!

Take it slowly and it will not be such a big change for either you or your baby. Weaning should be a fun experience for you both. After a very short time your baby will look forward to his solid feeds and will even start to let you know that he wants more!

What Are Your Kids Reading?

Responsible parenting is very much on everyone’s mind these days. Everywhere you look there are articles being written about it, television shows and videos which aim to alert parents to potential dangers facing their children, and websites and home pages filled with useful and helpful tips. The concerned parent has never had as many tools or as much information available to them to protect their children.

But, what are your kids reading?

Yes, that’s right, reading. Ten years ago, I read an article which said that reading skills in America ranked among the lowest in the industrialized nations of the world. The printed word was no longer viable, the interactive game was in, and civilization as we knew it was over. LCD readout had eplaced ink on paper as far as kids were concerned, and there was nothing that anybody could do about it.

And then along came J.K. Rowling, Lemony Snicket, and a number of others and BANG – according to Publishers Weekly, the Children’s/Young Adult book market is the fastest growing market in publishing! Tens of millions of books per year are printed for the 6-15 year old market, encompassing thousands of titles and hundreds of different sorts of subject matter. Go to any local library and the odds are that you will find that the Children’s/Young Adult section is one of the largest there is. And, of course, as children grow older and their reading skills continue to improve, the entire world of adult literature becomes available to them.

This, of course, is not a bad thing – however, even though a child has the skills to read something, the responsible parent needs to ask themselves: But do I really want them reading that yet? Is it, for example, appropriate for 8 year olds who have the skills to do so to read The Diary of Anne Frank, even though in many cases the child may not have developed the emotional maturity to be able to handle some of the more intense and disturbing aspects of that work?

All too often, parents adopt an attitude that goes something like: Well, at least they are reading. Whatever it is, it’s better than them sitting in front of the television! Unfortunately, this is not always the case. It is important to remember that a child’s imagination is usually far more vibrant than an adult’s is and, depending on their age, the line between what is real and what is imaginary is less clear. Children can be affected by the words they read on a number of different levels, and will often times emulate the characters they meet in books – both in their attitudes and their behaviors. As a parent, it is important that the books you allow your child to read reflect the value system that you have tried to instill in them. Just as with the monitoring you do of what your child watches on television or what video games he plays or websites he visits, if you don’t want your child exposed to (or think that they are too young for) violence, sexual content, drug use, or anything else a Young Adult or Children’s book may contain, it is up to you to make sure that they aren’t until you feel they are ready.

As with every other part of the publishing industry, sales and sales alone drive what is published in the world of Children/Young Adult literature and the trend recently seems to be towards more sophisticated storylines which often times outline many of the less positive aspects of our culture and life. As a responsible parent, it is up to you to decide when you feel your children have reached the point in their emotional development where you believe they will be able to process this sort of information without harm.

The problem then becomes: How can I possibly read all the books my children want to read before they do? Makes you wish you had an extra set of eyes, right?

There are some resources out there to help guide you. But, most of them either give you a synopsis, which frequently lacks enough details to make a truly educated decision, or, they only do write-ups of the good books, which would be fine if we lived in a perfect world. But things are looking up! There is a website, launched in 2005, that reviews books (and movies) from a parent’s perspective. Each book is critiqued on positive and negative examples of character traits (i.e. honesty, compassion, responsibility, etc.); as well as providing specific examples of any negative areas of influence (i.e. drug usage, sexual content, violence, etc.). All of these examples will tell a parent, at a glance, if that book is appropriate for their particular child.

Instilling the love of reading in a child’s life is one of the most important and positive things you can do for them as a parent. Watching what your child reads, and allowing them to grow into the books you choose together, is one way to help ensure that the values you have worked so hard to teach your children are reinforced by something that they love to do!

What Books Do Children Like?

Parents at times don't realize how critical it is to read to their children as early as infancy. Reading to a little one can promote a child's strong, cerebral, and emotional development. Any positive interaction between parent and child is helpful such as speaking, reading, and playing easy games. We want to make the most of every situation and build it into a learning event. Reading is a hands down way to attain this.

Different things in books such as features, phrasing, and pictures appeal to distinct age groups. As parents, we want to understand what type of book is excellent for a youngster at certain learning stages in their precious lives. Here is a breakdown of items that children react to at certain ages:

Newborn to 12 months: Children at this age react to solid, large books with big bright pictures. Bear in mind that your little one's vision is still evolving daily and the images we see may be clearer than their view. Big pictures stand out better and capture their attention. Books with covered and protected photos are great with this age group. It helps the newborn with name recognition and familiarity.

Toddlers 12-24 months: Strong board books are all the rage for this age. Toddlers love to take ownership and cart their books alongside them wherever they explore. Books with big pictures and few wording are excellent. Books that incorporate other babies and animals are great. At this age, books with these characters will aid in the learning process of labelling objects and animals in our environment.

Toddlers 2-3 years: Elementary storylines with a stimulating theme excite a child about reading. Select a book with their favorite TV figure to get them excited about reading. Books with nursery rhymes are notably significant to help with phonics and word relationships. Bedtime books, books that demonstrate a lesson about conduct, potty training, and sharing are critical. Also books that strengthen their knowledge of the alphabet, animals and shapes assist in their learning process.

Preschoolers to teens: Of course preschoolers do not grasp how to read yet, but should by this time delight in reading books and learning new stories. They should relish looking at books by themselves and be capable of reciting definite parts of the stories by looking at the pictures on the pages. The older a child gets of course, the vital thing is to make books accessible that are suitable for the reading level. Teenagers should be capable of reading novels that include their interests without having very many pictures to entertain them.

Finally as parents, it is our obligation to make books accessible for reading as well as instilling the joy and value of reading to our children. Many of us do not take to reading, but I don't feel any of us believe it is not a vital component of our children's rearing. We need to make the effort to make certain our children delight in the process of learning to read and the opportunities that reading opens up for them in their futures.

What Does Autism Look Like?

If you want to know what an autistic child looks like, look at your own child or grandchild.

Look at the children who live next door to you and take a glimpse at every child you walk past on the street. These could very well be the faces of autism. There is no visible indication that a child is affected by this disturbing neurological disorder.

Autism is the king of all tricksters. I know this to be true because whenever my husband and I take our son to the store or doctor’s office, the looks of disgust we receive in response to his unruly behavior never let up. Unless we inform someone, and we always have to, no one has a clue that he is autistic.

When our ten requests for Darius to “settle down” won’t get through to him, when he is climbing on chairs or is having a screaming fit, people continue to stare through us with questions of, “Why won’t they do something about him?” or “If that were my child I’d really handle him.”

From time to time, I find myself getting upset about the glares from individuals who would never think autism is the culprit. There have even been occasions when I’ve had to get a little nasty with those brave souls who dared to make a rude comment or stare for just a little longer than necessary. But, after all of the annoyance and rude exchanges, autism still lingers. It seems to me the only thing left to do is educate rather than disassociate.

So, what exactly is autism? A lot of people I’ve crossed paths with have no clue as to what this disorder is and are quick to misconstrue the meaning of autistic with ‘artistic’.
Autism doesn’t have anything to do with the arts; our children are extremely talented, but artistic and autistic are two different things.

Autism (pronounced awe-tizem) is an illness that affects social and communication skills. Some Autistic children have a hard time playing with others and making friends and some can’t talk. Many autistic children display behaviors that may include: repetitively pouring liquids from cup to cup, spinning around and not getting dizzy, not wanting to be touched or hugged, lining up toys and screaming for hours. Of course, every Autistic child is different. There are varying levels of this disorder and that’s why it is called a ‘spectrum’.

My seven-year old, who is on the low end of the spectrum is nonverbal and is only able to show me what he wants by taking me to it or bringing a picture to me. The fact that he can’t communicate is the reason for most of his severe temper tantrums.

Imagine for a moment being frustrated, but not being able to express why. Imagine you have a toothache, but you’re not able tell anyone. Think how you would feel if you really wanted affection, but a simple stroke of your skin caused physical pain.

These are a few of the things my son must face and because of this, I have become determined to put up a good fight for his life.

Right now, no one expert has been able to confirm what causes autism, but one thing is certain: bad parenting IS NOT the cause of this impairment. Unfortunately, you still have some who are ready and willing to wave the idea around that a parent can inflict autism onto their child. There are a few people I know who are still quick to say that there is nothing wrong with my son and he only needs to be disciplined. Although such an accusation hurts deeply, I now understand that it doesn’t matter who the person is or how well educated they may think they are on the subject of autism; no one can truly comprehend what it’s like to raise an autistic child unless they are raising one themselves.

I’ve recently come to the conclusion that there is nothing I can do about those who frown upon us. Autism is a part of my family’s life and it forever will be. A long time ago I accepted that we don’t fit into an ordinary mold; we do what we can to get over the next challenge that autism presents to us.

So far, my husband and I have laughed in Autism’s face while celebrating our eight-year old’s honor roll status and our seven-year old finally waving hello and goodbye. We’ve shown and proved that autism will not come in between our dreams of normalcy and happiness.

Still, there will forever be a battle to win with those who feel a disability is only a disability when it screams out at you from a wheelchair. There will always be one individual who thinks a good whipping is the only cure needed for an autistic child.

Sadly, for the millions of parents who know better, we can only continue to do what we do best: love and support our children. Nobody else will. We are the keepers of disappointment when we find that medical insurance does not cover highly expensive and much needed behavior therapy. We are the proactive and often angry parents questioning why sensory integration and assistive technology aren’t incorporated into our children’s individual education plan (IEP).

And some of those children are the ones you see in the grocery store shrieking at the top of their lungs or darting off nonstop at a moment’s notice. So please, don’t be quick to judge the parents. Looks are very deceiving. Take into account that it may not just be bad behavior; it may be autism.

What Foods Can Trigger Bed Wetting?

Bedwetting is an occurrence that is embarrassing, awkward, and disturbing for both parents and children. This is a condition that mostly affects kids in the five-years-old range, but can also strike children as old as fifteen. When properly handled, bedwetting can be treated without future incident. There is no single cause leading to bedwetting, but there are many different factors that contribute to the act, including excessive drinking right before bedtime or a bladder infection.

Chocolate

Food items that contain caffeine have been known to cause excessive urination. One of the culprits in this category that affects children is chocolate. Whether they receive it as a treat before bedtime or worse, enjoy a cup of hot cocoa, the caffeine within these items can act as a stimulant throughout your child's body. When caffeine is combined with sugar, the duo can be impossible on a child with a sensitive bladder.

Bubbly Drinks

Since children have no developed bladders yet, they usually cannot handle the carbonation in bubbly drinks. Besides soda, Gatorade can trigger bedwetting. Some doctors advise cutting down the total amount of water consumed by a child throughout the day. It is true adults need to consume sixty-four ounces of water daily, but a child only needs half that amount.

Oranges and Grapefruits

There is a high percentage of water in citrus fruits, like oranges and grapefruits. Moreover, their high acid levels have been proved to strongly affect sensitive bladders, resulting in the need to urinate in the middle of the night. Children whose bladders are not used to such nocturnal activities end up with bedwetting if they consume too much citric fruits.

Spicy Foods

Had a late dinner and your child really loves the extra salsa on their taco? The ingredients within the salsa, as well as in other spicy foods may contribute to bedwetting. Spicy foods have been known to speed up the elimination processes within the body.

Food Allergens

Some kinds of foods are known for their ability to create spasms in the bladder, which might lead to bedwetting. Thus, the reason behind your child’s problem might be an allergic reaction to a food he may have eaten right before sleeping. Corn, peanuts, eggs, soy, wheat and dairy products are some of the food products that might trigger bedwetting. Also avoid giving your child foods that are high in preservatives, colors and sweeteners right before bedtime.

Tips and Advice

In order to keep your child from bedwetting, keep him away from foods that can trigger the problem. In addition, you may have to try various behavior techniques. You can use a bedwetting alarm if your child is over seven years old; a bedwetting alarm has had a high percentage of success. If your child is younger, you can try the reward technique if your child keeps his bed dry throughout the night. In addition, this technique will also encourage your child to avoid consuming the foods that can trigger bedwetting. As your child gets older, have him change his wet sheet. Your child is then likely to avoid bedwetting just to avoid this chore.

What I Love About My Father

I have been thinking a lot about my father ever since we celebrated Father's Day together earlier this summer. This is by no means the first time that I've ever thought about what makes my father such a special person in my life, but I have been far more intentional about reflecting on him in the past few weeks than ever before.

Perhaps I feel urgent about reflecting on my father's life and impact because he is getting older and becoming more and more like an old man. I'm not sure, I just know that I feel like it is important for me at this stage of life to figure out just why I love him and then to share it with him. Being a writer, my emotions and thoughts are expressed much easier in writing than verbally, so I'm planning to make a journal of sorts about my father and to share it with him on next year's Father's Day. The very first thing that comes to mind when I think about the way I love my father is how he has always been the best teacher. He is the one that taught me how to ride my bike without training wheels and how to catch a softball in my mit. He is the one that helped me with multiplication tables when I was stuck and the one that took me out for hours of driving practice before I got my license. My father is a great teacher because he is patient, gentle and a great communicator.

Another thing I love about my father is the priority and commitment he places on our family. I have never seen another father who is so committed to family time and to being involved in the lives of the ones he loves. Far too many fathers are consumed by work, but not my dad. Throughout my childhood, teenage years, and no into adulthood my father has been the most consistent of any parent I've seen. I appreciate that consistency so much yet I'm not sure that I have ever expressed that to my dad. This is the year.

A third thing that I love about my father is the way he loves my mother. Everything I know about love I have learned from watching my parents love each other. I am well aware of the rare gift that is, and I cherish it closely. I want to be sure to communicate to my dad what it has meant that he has loved my mother in front of us so well for so many years.

If you are privileged enough to have a father, then I suggest that you start being intentional about loving him and about thanking him for all that he has done for you. There is no better way to honor a parent.

What is a Secret

As parents we have so much to worry about in regards to our children. We want to protect them from all of lifes dangers, yet we want to accomplish this without putting unnecessary fear into their lives.

When my children were small, we began talking about secrets. What is a good secret and what is a bad secret? This seemed to be a concept my children could understand, while accomplishing my goal of not scaring them.

Good secrets are things that you get to tell mommy or daddy. Such as we bought daddy a birthday gift. Today it's a secret but tomorrow we get to tell daddy. Another good secret is when the principal at school tells you there will be a party for your teacher but today it's a secret. Tomorrow however we get to tell the teacher.

As your children get a bit older, a good secret might even be your friend telling you she likes a boy. While your child may be asked not to tell the boy, your child could certainly tell you this secret.

So what is a bad secret? A bad secret is a secret that your child is asked to NEVER tell. A bad secret might be another child admitting they did something wrong and asking your child not to tell. It might also be an adult acting inappropriately with your child and telling the child to keep this a secret and not tell mommy.

My kids asked of course, "who will tell us bad secrets?". I began to tell them that bad people tell bad secrets, and quickly realized this is not true at all. Instead I chose to tell them that a bad secret can come from both a child and an adult who is doing something wrong. To this day I still believe that only someone doing something wrong will ask a child to keep a secret from mommy or daddy.

My kids and I spent many hours talking about secrets and that mommy and/or daddy must always be told secrets. I also assured them that they would NEVER get in trouble for telling mommy or daddy a secret. I can remember a few times, my kids slipping and telling a good secret when they weren't supposed to, but I kept my word and they never got in trouble. You see, I have often heard that someone acting inappropriately will say "if you tell your mommy, you will get in trouble". I never wanted my child to have a visual image of getting in trouble for telling mommy a secret.

What Is Difficult Child Behaviour?

Most of us have strong opinions on how to guide our children's behaviour. Unfortunately, these opinions often focus on stopping the inappropriate behaviour and neglect to give significant emphasis to helping children learn new, more appropriate ways to behave. People who work with young children have a golden opportunity and an awesome responsibility to help children learn to make appropriate behaviour choices which, in turn, can lead to enhanced self-esteem and self-discipline.

To be effective, discipline for young children must be in place before the rules are broken. As a process of guidance, discipline can be divided into two major components: indirect and direct. In the area of indirect guidance, we need to look at the organization of the environment to encourage autonomy and to empower children. As well, we need to look at the people -- the teachers -- who nurture and help children learn.

Lots of parents worry about their children’s active, noisy behaviour and tantrums. Sometimes it can be hard to work out whether a child’s behaviour is normal, or the sign of a behavioural disorder.

Tantrums
Tantrums are not usually anything to worry about. They’re a way of expressing frustration and most children have them in their early years (from age one to four). They can be loud and violent, and it's normal to find them upsetting or embarrassing.

Sometimes, if you can tell your child is about to have a tantrum, you may be able to distract her by getting her to look at something or giving a favourite toy.

Excitability
Young children, especially those aged five and below, are often energetic, noisy and excitable. Usually this liveliness is quite normal.

Sometimes, active and noisy children can be quite a handful, talking all the time, not doing as they’re told and seeming very restless. This kind of overactive behaviour is more usual among boys. Although this can be hard to deal with, it’s only when a child’s behaviour is extreme that it suggests a behavioural disorder.

Naughtiness
All children are naughty - scribbling on walls, fighting with siblings, cheekiness and ignoring requests are all part and parcel of growing up. Sometimes this behaviour is isolated to one-off incidents, or it may be a phase your child is going through.

Naughty behaviour may be caused by your child testing your reaction to find out what's allowed or triggered by a change in her environment (eg worries about school). It may be down to jealousy of a sibling or it may be a way to attract your attention.

What Is The Point Of School Uniforms?

School uniforms are the cause for much debate these days with some people claiming that all schools should adopt them and others claiming that school uniforms are going to be the ruin of civilization as we know it. People tend to feel strongly on the subject of school uniforms, that is a fact and it is also a fact that many schools could very well choose to put school uniforms into effect over the next couple of years.

There are some definite pros and cons of both sides, and strangely enough some of them are the same. Confused yet? It is simple really, take the following into consideration. One of the big arguments for school uniforms is that by using them and forcing the students to look alike you are taking out their individuality. This can be seen as a good thing because individuality can often cause trouble among people. The more they all look the same the less likely they are to fight and disturb each other. People claim that if all of the kids dressed the same in their school uniforms they would not have as much to pick on other for. Clothes can be a huge divider and if they are taken out of the equation by making use of school uniforms then what will there be left to fight about?

Personally, I think that this argument takes away the credit young people deserve when it comes to their ability to wreak havoc. Let’s face it, not everyone is going to look the same as the others even when they all dress alike. Some are bound to look better in the school uniforms than others which still leaves many open to cruelty.

There is a flip side to the all looking the same in school uniforms theory. Many people feel that by taking away the students individuality you are not lessening the cause for trouble but only taking away the things that make people special. People are who they are and most people, especially young people define themselves by the way they look. If you take away their right to express themselves through the way that they look they will have to find some other way to do it and theses ways could very well be worse and more destructive than funky clothing.

School uniforms are a fact of life for many students, especially those in religious and private schools. For the most part the school uniforms do not seem to be making too much of a difference either way in terms of the behavior of the students. Schools where there are school uniforms being worn are just as likely to see violence and arguments in the halls as those without any school uniforms.

Children will be children and it does not matter what you dress them up in, whether it is school uniforms or jeans they are still going to behave like children. Children can be mean and they will find something to pick on others about if they are a bully, whether it is the way they look in their school uniforms or in their jeans.

What Parents Need to Know About Child Safety and Identification

There seems to be a general misconception concerning child safety and child identification. In speaking with parents, one thing becomes very clear. Parents commonly believe, that by recording their children’s fingerprints and DNA information, they have taken all the steps necessary in order to protect as well as provide identification for their children.

Unfortunately, this could not be further from the truth. Common sense dictates that the only time a child’s fingerprints or DNA information would ever become necessary would be in the worst-case scenario, after the unthinkable has happened.

We as parents would like to watch over our children 24-hours a day, thereby, ensuring our children’s safety. However, this is unrealistic.

In situations where young children get separated from their parents as well as natural disasters such as: hurricanes, floods, earthquakes and tsunamis, we are reminded time and again, that children do not carry identification.

A Canadian company seems to have taken a very logical approach towards helping parents protect their children. Their small label can give parents great peace of mind as far as their children are concerned. Jerry Scala founded Child ID Labels inc. in 1995, with the intentions of offering his identification concept to fellow members of his congregation. However, within nine months, the fledgling program gained national exposure with their first recovery.

The company’s first successful recovery happened on Easter Weekend, 1996, outside of Toronto, Canada. While his parents were in the kitchen, a small three year-old boy let himself out and wandered three blocks before ending up in a convenience store. The store’s clerk noticed the identification label on the outside of the back collar and contacted the toll free number on the id label. The authorities, with Child ID's help, had the young escapee in his parent’s arms in less than eight minutes.

Child ID’s program helps parents deal with everyday events that happen, not out of neglect, but are due to situations that are beyond our control. Unlike other programs that are passive in nature and wait for something to happen before they spring into action, This company’s unique focus and approach towards child safety and identification is proactive as well as preventative, thereby, offering parents an unparalleled amount of peace of mind.

In today’s world, identity theft is not at all uncommon and, therefore, a very real concern.
Each Child ID “kit” is assigned a unique, personal identification number (PIN) code, which is specific to each family.

The company supplies parents with an unlimited supply of the coded iron-on identification labels and coded weatherproof stickers, which can be placed on literally anything that leaves the home as well as key rings, which list the family's unique pin code, which can be used for school bags, sports bags, luggage etc.

The id labels and coded stickers protect the families privacy as they contain only the company name, a message that reads "If Found Call", a toll free number as well as the PIN code; this ensures the prompt and accurate identification of a child after a 1-800 number is called.

If anyone locates a lost child who is wearing the identification labels, a phone call is all it takes to identify the child and contact the parents.

Child ID Labels Inc.’s concept focuses on the fact that “Children do not carry id, if they did they would likely loose it. We as adults never leave home without our id, frightening but true; there is more identification on the neighborhood dogs than on our children.

For pre-teens, the elderly who suffer from Alzheimer’s as well as the intellectually challenged, the company also offers their version of a “no name” label, which simply reads in bold letters “If Found Call” and the same toll free number as well as the family’s PIN code. When called, the 1-800 number links the caller to a monitoring service, which is staffed twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week.

The company’s database contains the PIN codes assigned to families so there is no danger of anyone identifying the child except Child ID. One of the many advantages to this labelling system, is the labels can be as visible or invisible as the parents feel necessary.

The company recommends that for individuals who might be considered high flight risk, such as Autistic children or sufferers of Alzheimer’s, the label should be placed in plain view. In one case the company has recovered a 21 year-old autistic man twice.

This program seems to have taken everything into account. For those parents who believe that prevention far outweighs the cure, it’s nice to know that there is a company working to protect and keep our children safe.

What Parents Need to Know About Fussy Babies

Parenting is a difficult job. Knowing what to do in every situation is impossible, especially when it comes to infant feeding.

New mom Heidi Higgins experienced this firsthand when her formula-fed baby girl, Sophia, was constantly fussy, especially after feedings.

"We tried everything to soothe her - from bouncy swings to car rides," Higgins said. "It was not until we switched to a soy infant formula recommended by our pediatrician that Sophia's fussiness was relieved in less than a week."

Higgins is just one of many parents who are unaware that a soy-based formula may help manage persistent common infant feeding problems in formula-fed babies. According to a recent survey among moms with formula-fed newborns, only one in 10 moms is aware that switching to soy formula can help manage persistent common feeding problems.

"Breast-feeding is the gold standard in infant nutrition and the best choice for both baby and mom," said Bridget Swinney, registered dietitian, mom and author of the books "Healthy Food for Healthy Kids" and "Eating Expectantly." "However, if mom can't breast-feed or chooses not to breast-feed, and her baby is unable to tolerate a milk-based formula, a soy infant formula, like Isomil Advance, may help improve persistent common feeding problems."

Generally, the surveyed

mothers had a positive view of soy, but many felt they had very little information when it came to soy infant formula. Surveyed moms identified feeding problems as gassiness, spit-up and crying. They believed that these problems typically improved with age.

It's always best for parents to talk with their baby's pediatrician before changing their baby's infant formula or diet. Pediatricians recommend parents be patient when feeding problems first arise, as not all babies benefit from switching formulas. However, if a pediatrician recommends it, a soy infant formula, like Isomil Advance, can provide all the nutrients infants need to grow and develop like breast-fed babies or babies fed milk-based infant formulas.

What Parents Should Know About Teens And Teasing At School

For most teens, going back to school means sharing classrooms and a building with many other students. Unfortunately some learners have to deal with inappropriate behavior such as teasing. Teasing is the act of harassing someone playfully or maliciously, especially by ridicule. It is hurtful and potentially dangerous.

Judy S. Freedman’s book "Easing the Teasing" is very helpful for dealing with children’s teasing issues. It specifically helps parents learn strategies to help their children deal with teasing. Some of the suggested strategies can also be used successfully with teens so it’s definitely a recommended title for parents and educators to peruse. This article is not going to describe the strategies so well explained by Freedman. The goal of this article is to impress on parents the reality of teasing in our school system and how schools in general undertake to deal with discipline and behavior management issues. From this understanding it is hoped that parents will be are more able to work collaboratively with their teen and school personnel should a problem arise.

Due to the differing sizes of elementary and secondary schools, it can generally be asserted that during the elementary school years there is more of a ‘handle’ on teasing than in secondary schools. That is certainly not to say that secondary schools are ignoring the problem. For example, secondary schools may have home room teachers discuss such topics with students; there may be the occasional guest speaker such as a police liaison who addresses the students on this or a similar topic and, faculty are surely expected to reinforce standards of appropriate behavior. Administrative personnel at many schools use an electronic system to track inappropriate student behavior - usually serious incidents. Grade-level meetings are also commonly scheduled to discuss student achievement, work habits and if relevant to the former, behavior. The main challenge in most secondary schools however, is that each teacher typically instructs over a hundred students daily so it’s understandably difficult to monitor, document and discuss student behavior with colleagues on a consistent basis.

Parents who notice a sudden change in their teen’s behavior should consider contacting the school counselor and home room teacher to investigate whether or not the student is having trouble at school. It is important to note that even if a student consistently earns good grades, all may not be going well for the young scholar; they may have other challenges at school. Because teens might try to hide a problem with teasing, parents need to be extremely vigilant in their observation, listening and conversation. Teasing is hurtful and potentially dangerous. It is a form of bullying. Low self-esteem, depression, eating disorders and in the extreme, teen suicide are possible results. Experiencing harassment in this form – whether it is done ‘playfully’ or maliciously, is clearly a serious problem that must be dealt with.

What’s In My Diaper Bag? A Humorous Look At A Working Mom’s Life In A Bag…

As a business owner and mom, I regularly commute between my home office and a rented office space. Sometimes I begin to feel like a baggage handler by the time I make it to the office. Believe me, toting a laptop computer, diaper bag, stack of files, lunch for the day and my infant son is no easy task. I am hoping it counts as exercise though!

The diaper bag I carry seems to have taken on a life of its own as it has grown to its capacity. It definitely holds more than baby items. It is my lifeline!

I recently went through my bag hoping to scale down a bit. Here are some of the items I found:

•Diapers and Wipes and other baby things (it IS a diaper bag after all)
•Cell Phone (doubles as a teether, but don’t forget to lock your keypad so baby can’t call Tokyo)
•Tylenol For Baby
•Tylenol For Me (or something stronger)
•Business Cards
•Energy Bars (sometimes lunch is a luxury)
•Telephone Headset (device that allows you to breastfeed, talk on the phone and work on the computer at the same time).
•Loose Change (usually left over from a McDonalds drive-thru trip)
•Crayons and a Coloring Book (to keep my 4 year old occupied while I’m on the phone with clients)
•Dollar Bills (to bribe my 4 year old while I’m on the phone with clients)
•Duct Tape (for emergencies only….again with the 4 year old and being on the phone with clients)
•Sandwich Bag full of Cheerios (for baby and sometimes the energy bars aren’t enough)
•To Do List (in case you actually find time to work)

In my attempt to scale down, I realized I just needed a bigger diaper bag. I see no reason to fight it. My needs will only increase as my son gets older and more mobile. Diaper bag designs will just have to evolve to work for me!

Right now I am thinking one with wheels would be good. I can picture it now: a huge diaper bag on wheels that will hold all of the above items, plus my files, my laptop and my lunch with an infant seat mounted on top for my son.

In all seriousness, diaper bags have come a long way since my daughter was born. I did end up scaling down a bit and began shopping for something a little more sophisticated. Something without a bunny design would be a great start! I was really pleased to find a great selection of fashion forward bags for moms. They are functional yet hip! The available fabrics are out of this world and you can find every style and size imaginable. I finally settled on a bag that fits both my mom and business owner lifestyles. I feel like a million bucks now.

Well actually, a million bucks is a bit of an exaggeration. The diaper bag was a tremendous improvement to my “look” but I will still need to do something about my ponytail and sweatpants. That will have to be a different article.

What sport should my kid play?

I have a four year old son. He is very physically active and has great motor skills. Far better at most sports they I was at his age. Most of our friends have their children in sports and like most "soccer moms" they drive from event to event - especially on the weekends. We tagged along to a few soccer games and a number of things struck me during and after the games. The most obvious was that there were plenty of kids there who would have rather been somewhere else and who's parents were the excited part of the group. There were also parents yelling and carrying on. At their kids no less. This is not right I thought, I have to take a look at this.

By now you are saying "this guy must have been watching a game in some rough side of town" but nothing could be further from the truth. No the problem was not to be found in the surroundings or in the kids for the matter. It was to be found in the parents and their approach at the game. I would be a great blessing if someone would write the "how to get your kids into sports handbook - parents edition". I could hand them out by the box. Here is the basic problem. Is the kid doing a sport because you expect him/her to, or because they have a great amount of fun when then play? Simple enough question right? Well I asked 10 parents after the game and all of them said, "oh he loves it". "Are you sure?" I would ask, "how can you tell?". I got some blank looks and some laughed. "We know out kids", were the most common answer. Did they I thought.

I next asked the kids one by one, what they liked about the game they just played. I got some rather interesting answers to be sure. "my friend Tommy was here", "I scored so daddy will be happy", "I wanted to go home, by belly hurt but I had to play". Had to play? Why? I asked. "My big brother played and I have to do everything he did". Ok now I had something to talk about. Lets take a look at why we have our kids in sports at all.

* Outdoor activity
* Keeps the physically active
* Builds strong bodies
* Builds self confidence
* Kids have fun
* Something we can do together

I am sure there are more reasons but these came up more often then any other in my little survey. In this case it was soccer but in the case of Hockey the outdoor element is obviously removed. None the less I feel that the parents intent here was to make the kid get out of the house, not to just be out doors. I mean it that was the case, make him run around the house a few laps. Keeping the child active is a great idea and with so many children being fatter then ever I am all for it. Again though, it that was all we could take a walk with them or ride our bikes. Why sports? Building of the bodies is true to an extent, but it can also be too much for a child. We have to make sure it is done with moderation. Self confidence. Now here is something I hear all the time. Sure when the kid is good at what they do and when they feel they can overcome problems by trying harder that is good, but what will happen to a 4 year old child who fails? We will get back to this is a moment. Kids have fun. I should hope so, but I saw a few who did not and there are some reasons why. And lastly, we do something together. Something we can both enjoy and be excited about. Fair enough, so long as that is not a one way street.

Lets break down these arguments further. What will motivate us to chose a sport for our children? Our own experience usually. Did we play something as kids. Were we good? I see parents projecting themselves onto their kids by first choosing the sport, then expecting allot from the kids. Often more then they can deliver. I saw a man in a part once who was throwing a softball to a very small buy, maybe 5 years old. The boy kept missing and missing and all the man said was "come on, try!". The buy tried and failed. Tried and failed. he started crying and his father said "there is no crying in baseball, now hit the ball". I was ready to take the father aside and show him my size 12 shoe but I thought better of it. We can all see what he did wrong, but can we see a lesser example of the same? Are we doing it maybe without knowing it. Perhaps.

We as humans learn much faster from failure then success so make sure you arrange for your children to succeed the first few times you do something with them. Positive thinking. If they fail anyway, change the thing you are doing until they succeed. I kicked a soccer ball to my son and although he could kick it back, he chose to pick it up with his hands. Instead of telling him that picking it up was bad and thus make the whole thing negative, I showed him how he could throw the ball to my foot and then I did the same. Soon the ball was back on the ground and we were playing like normal. They don't know the rules, they just want to succeed and they measure that success by your reaction and your praise. If they don't have any fun with something or just plain can't do it, move on to something else. Do not push them into some sport because that is what you wanted to do. Let them show you what they want. Expose them to several and observe them. Are they quick at picking up the rules? Can they do it will?

In the end it is most important that they have fun. They have fun if you are proud of them and if they are allowed to succeed. Give them every means to do so and let them lead the way. Not every kid will like soccer because his brother did. Let him chose for himself. That builds confidence.

What the Teens Should Consider in Choosing their Career

One way to understand the teens is their choice of career. In pursuing the right career, the teens want the right information, advice and guidance. This is very important because choosing a wrong career would result to a waste of so much time, effort, money and would surely frustrate the teenagers. Discouraged teenagers will lose the desire for a profitable endeavor and this will definitely affect their attitude towards work.

The abilities of the teenagers must be considered first in choosing the right career. This includes their intellectual levels, educational qualifications and skills. Knowing the abilities of teens is very important especially in entry level positions where there are so many jobs seekers vying for the same position.

Teens want advises to equip them with the right training. Parents must understand their teens in this aspect by identifying their capabilities, strengths and weaknesses. This is an added factor in determining the capability of the teenagers to do multi-tasking. Various agencies are conducting trainings, seminars and workshops in different categories. These trainings are either short or long periods. What the teens shall do is search their local newspapers for announcements or contact concerned private or government agencies.

The teenagers must also decide on the kind of job they want and the company they will be applying. They must have thorough information on the kinds of benefits that the company offers; whether the job will be a long or short term opportunity and the career advancements they have for their workers. Both lifetime and short stints are exhausting, so why contend on careers, which have little benefits if teenagers can grab a better job?

The teenagers, if ever they will be hired, will experience difficulty in adjusting to their jobs. Pressures in meeting deadlines and in accomplishing tasks will cause so much stress and if not properly answered, may cause nervousness and fears to meet the daily challenges in the actual work environment.

Several counseling centers are available to assist the teens. These centers are manned by experts in their respective fields, such as psychologists and health experts to management personnel like human resource managers who cause much fear among job applicants. But seeking the help of counselors in choosing the right career has little benefits only. They are just designed to help the teenagers assess themselves, understand their needs and implement the right action. Choosing the right career is one, the full utilization of the career is another. Here, the teens’ right attitudes, outlook in life, their dreams and aspirations could not be all learned from career counseling. The best counseling that the teens could get are acquired from their own families.

The family is the most influential factor to the teens’ choice of careers. The parents must broaden their understanding on what the teens want so that the right support could be given. The attitude of the teens towards their career is affected by what they hear from their parents. If a parent always complains about his job, most likely, the teens would reject the same career. If their parents have enjoyed their jobs, contented and happy, then there is a great possibility that their teens will follow the same career path.

What To Do About A Toddler Biting And Kicking

While it can be embarrassing, frustrating, and sometimes frightening, for the most part, this type of behavior by toddlers is a normal phase that they all pass through. It's a part of their growth and development, and usually results from a frustration at not being able to express themselves, whether it is wanting a toy, or wanting your attention.

The phase can hit anywhere from 14 months and up, but tends to be more noticeable when the child is exposed to others, which could mean in a childcare center, or social setting. Even children who are linguistically advanced for their ages, are still children, and will be prone to the same frustrations as others.

The first rule of thumb, is not to overreact. While there are different schools of thought on spanking, this is not a situation where it is appropriate, and can only add fuel to the fire. A time-out is in order, generally about two minutes worth on a chair where they can't stomp on the floor, or kick anything. This also gives you a chance to calm down. During the time-out, do not speak to them, but do explain when you sit them down, that this time-out is because they have bit/hit/kicked someone and that is not allowed.

When the time is up, explain to them again, that the behavior is not acceptable, because it hurts other people. It's not of much use to ask them how they would feel if someone bit them, since a toddler is unlikely to be able to relate cause and effect, then apply it to themselves. But a non-confrontational "punishment", and explanation, tells them what they did wrong, and what will happen if they do it again.

If they go right out and repeat the action, take them back for another time-out. Depending on the age of the child, you can explain the concept of apologies, and why they should make one. Use positive reinforcement by praising them for an apology (even if it comes as a kiss), or for going right out and giving their toy to the child they kicked.

What To Do If Your Child Has Chicken Pox

Chicken pox is a common affliction that affects people of all ages but is most commonly seen in children. The symptoms of chicken pox are red bumps on the body that turn into blisters and that increase in quantity over several days. The bumps may look like insect bites or a rash and is often difficult to diagnose the first few days. Often, it is accompanied by a fever. Watch the bumps to see if they turn into blisters and if more bumps emerge over a few days. If so, it is likely chicken pox.

Most cases of chicken pox do not even need a consultation with a physician and are easily treatable. However there are times when consulting a doctor is advisable. If after three days you are still unsure of the diagnosis, consult a doctor. If the child is an infant, you should bring the child in for diagnosis. If your child’s bumps seem infected or are located on eyelids, it is best to get it checked. Also, if your child seems unusually ill, has severe headaches, a high fever that lasts more than five days, or if the child develops other cold like symptoms such as a cough a doctor’s opinion should be sought.

Chicken pox is highly contagious and the child should be quarantined for the duration. Do not allow the child to interact with peers at school or with friends. Once the child starts getting spots, it will take approximately seven days until he or she is no longer contagious. The day after all the spots have scabbed, the child will no longer be contagious and can resume normal activity.

The accompanying fever should only be treated if it is above 101° F. Studies indicate a slight fever will help the child heal. Motrin, Advil or Tylenol can be used to treat the fever. Use only acetaminophen and ibuprofen products for fever but do not use aspirin. A child can have a severe reaction to aspirin during this time so it is important not to use it.

The child should try not to scratch the bumps because it may cause infection. Take greater care to keep the fingernails short and clean during this time. Frequent baths will help soothe the itching. Adding oatmeal to the bath will also help. Brands such as Aveeno are ideal for this. Benadryl or other off-brand topical antihistamines can be used as needed and greatly reduce the itching. These are readily available over-the-counter at any pharmacy.

Children who have chicken pox and who have a slight fever but otherwise seem well typically do not need to see a doctor. Ensure they stay isolated until the ailment passes and they are no longer contagious. See a doctor if unusual symptoms occur or if the child seems very ill. Chicken pox is a common ailment, easily treated, and quickly recovered from. Most people only get one case of chicken pox in a lifetime.

What To Do When Your Child Acts Up

Every parent has been there. Your usually angelic (or at least moderately well behaved) child is suddenly intractable, full of rage, or even engaged in a full-blown temper tantrum. Worse, your usual discipline measures don't even make a dent in the attitude or anger. What to do?

First of all it is important to gain some modicum of control. If you can't get your child under control and you are in a public place then remove yourselves from the public eye. If you are home send your child to their bedroom. If you are somewhere public then try to find some privacy in an empty room, bathroom, or even your car. Sometimes taking control and giving everyone some breathing room will defuse the situation, but if not then ask yourself three key questions:

First, is there a physical cause? Is your child tired or hungry or overstimulated? Children's bodies do not have the same stamina as adults and if they are not given several small meals (or larger meals interspersed with small snacks) and a good night's sleep as well as some down time during the day they simply lose the ability to cope. Some children simply shut down or fall down (asleep) but others act out instead. In addition, children have only the limited experience of their short lives and a day that is too full of emotion or activity can overwhelm them. Sometimes simply too much change or newness can be overwhelming to a child used to a specific routine or environment.

Second, is there anything else going on in your child's life that might be causing stress or is there anything else going on in your life that might be causing stress to your child? Children are creatures of habit. While they enjoy the new they also crave routine. Sometimes they need more time to adjust to routine and sometimes they actually need the ritual of discipline to give them security. The familiar dynamic of discipline is comforting because at least that hasn't changed.

Third, has your child matured or moved into a different phase of development since your last discipline strategy was developed? For example, when my son was three we suddenly discovered our traditional time-out method wasn't working. However with a slight modification (changing the location) we were back in business. As he grows older the time-out is now longer and often comes with built-in penalties for continued misbehavior. As your child grows and develops so does your discipline strategy. Perhaps you can simply modify the existing method or perhaps you need to come up with a whole new plan.

After reviewing your answers to these three key questions hopefully it is time to release your child from their time out and to talk things through. Ask your child what is going on? Ask your child what their punishment (if further punishment is needed) should be? Younger children won't always be able to express themselves fully but you may learn some surprising insights into your child's mind. Then follow through with what you have decided as a punishment and make sure your child understands that while you love them you will not tolerate the behavior you just punished.

What to Do When Your Child Is Overweight

With your busy day to day schedule with work and things to do at home, you often don’t notice some of the things that are right in front of you every day. At times, you may sit back and suddenly realize that your child has grown eight inches taller or that his/her hair has gotten longer. It’s often little things like these that happen each day that seem to go unnoticed for periods of time. Perhaps you’ve been starting to notice that your child has been putting on a little extra weight, or maybe you’ve noticed it for some time now and it’s become a cause for concern. If your child has developed an overweight problem there are some steps that you can take to help them to start getting their weight back under control.

To start with, take your child to your family doctor for a routine checkup. Your doctor can determine whether your child has an under functioning thyroid or any other medical problem that may be causing the weight gain. Once cleared of any medical conditions, the doctor may suggest a certain type of weight loss diet and or exercise program for your child to follow.

At home, you can start to encourage your child to develop healthier eating habits. You can buy more fruits for snacking rather than the usual high fat ones found in the snack isle. You should even let him/her pick which fruits you buy so you know they are ones that they will eat. Also, rather than buying soda for your child to drink, buy sports drinks like powerade or various fruit juices. Also, try to get your child in the habit of drinking more water, and use the sports drinks and fruit juices for occasions like lunch or dinner time.

Plan healthy meals every day, and plan out your child’s portions wisely, and make sure your child never skips breakfast. Skipping breakfast can make your child hungry and looking for less healthy things to eat later in the day. Also try to avoid eating fast food as often as possible. Eating healthy meals at home can help your child start to learn to develop better eating habits. If it becomes a regular household routine, he/she will be more likely to “go with the flow” and start to enjoy eating different healthy foods.

Never use food as a reward for your child to get them to eat healthy. By telling your child that you will give him/her a slice of cake for desert if they eat all of their vegetables, you are in effect telling them that the cake has a higher value than the vegetables. The cake becomes the “pot of gold” you get for reaching the end of the rainbow.

Another thing you can and should do is to encourage your child to get more physically active. Encourage him/her to join an activity at school such as basketball or track. Find out what activities are offered through the community such as swimming or volleyball, and try to find one that your child might enjoy.

Make time to go on bike rides with your child or to take walks through the local park or hiking trail with them and make these things a weekly event you do with them on a regular basis. Have your child help you wash the car every weekend. Give them some household chores to do and make these chores their responsibility every week. The idea is just to have them doing things that will keep them active and moving.

If a reasonable amount of time has gone by after you’ve changed your child’s eating habits and gotten him/her more active and you don’t see them reaching a healthy weight, you may want to consider a weight control treatment program. Many of these programs will have a variety of people on staff who are experts in specific areas such as doctors, registered dietitians and fitness trainers. They can collectively asses your child’s individual needs and formulate an overall plan to best deal with the problem. They can also help you learn how to keep up the healthy eating and exercise habits for your child after the program ends. Your family doctor can refer you to a treatment center that will best suit your child’s needs.

Remember that the first step is simply the fact that you recognize if there is a problem with your child’s weight. Being in denial about your child’s weight problem if there is an obvious problem existing only serves to lead your child to unwanted, potentially dangerous health problems as time goes by. Taking steps to help your child with this sooner, leads to a healthier life for your child later.

What To Make Sure You Keep In Your Baby's Diaper Bag

A diaper bag is one of those essentials most Moms would be lost without. As Michelle from Minneapolis stated, “One day I left the house without my diaper bag. I didn’t realize I forgot it until I went to reach for it when I needed a diaper to change my baby. I ended up having to find a store and purchase diapers, baby wipes, and an outfit because the one my baby was wearing had become soiled. While I was in the store I bought a second diaper bag. I now keep that diaper bag packed and in my vehicle at all times so that I always have the essentials I need even if I’m forgetful and forget to take my main diaper bag with me when I go somewhere.”

When you want to take an excursion out of your home with a small baby, there’s no telling what you might need. A good diaper bag can hold everything you might need including diapers, baby wipes, diaper ointment, baby powder, clothing, bottles, food, just about anything else you might possibly need while out and about with your baby.

The most important item in a diaper bag is diapers. If you need to, you can carry up to a dozen of the thickest diapers in a diaper bag. In another large compartment of the bag you can put in several changes of clothes. Some other useful things to put in the bag are bibs, baby cups, burp cloths, washcloths, a blanket, pacifiers, toys, snacks, food (along with utensils for feeding) and baby bottles. A towel to use as an “anywhere” changing pad is another essential item. In fact, anything that you need to use on a daily basis should go into the diaper bag. But keep in mind that all that “stuff” in your diaper bag can make it really heavy so if you are going to have to be carrying it for a long distance or are only going on a short trip, make sure to just pack the essentials.

It is a good idea to keep your diaper bag at least partially ready all the time. Some people have diapers, pacifiers, blankets, an extra set of clothes, and toys stashed away in their diaper bags permanently. .

In the past, diaper bags were little more than large plastic shoulder bags with one or two big compartments. And they weren’t very attractive either. They were used because one didn't have a choice. Today that’s all changed. You can find diaper bags that vary from basic, to trendy, to designer. Designer bags are very attractive and stylish, but they typically also have a large price tag too.

The simple design of some diaper bags may fool you into believing there’s nothing much inside. But, you may be surprised to see some nifty features like a pullout changing pad or special pockets for keys and cell phones. Most of today’s’ diaper bags come with nylon linings to prevent messy spills from ruining the bag.

One of the most attractive diaper bags I’ve seen looks very much like a purse, and everything inside the diaper bag - changing pad, storage bag, wipes case - can come out. So, you can ultimately use it as a purse. Another one of my favorites has a non-slip grip on the strap, so the bag will not slide off when you bend to pick something up. A great feature in some bags is that they can easily be attached to a stroller with rings and clips that are included in the bag. Just be sure the diaper bag is positioned properly on the stroller so that the weight of it doesn’t tip the stroller over.

Besides the cost, the only factors you have to keep in mind while purchasing the perfect diaper bag is size and comfort. The diaper bag that’s perfect for your neighbor may not be the right diaper bag for you. Take time to look at several different diaper bags before making your purchase so that you get the bag that is just right for you and your baby.

What To Tell Your Kids About Money – The 7 Essential Lessons

If I had a dollar for every time I have been asked by a parent what to tell your kids about money, I’d be a millionaire. There are many different aspects of money management you can & should tell your children about. Here I will share with you what I believe are seven of the most important principles

1. Money can be exchanged for goods or services.
This is one of the first few lessons you should teach your child once they are old enough to understand – usually around the age of 3 years. Next time you go down to the corner store to buy one or two items, let your child hand the money to the cashier. By doing so, they will gain a greater appreciation of the concept of being able to exchange money for things you want or need.

2. One should be careful with money.
Some people I know, seem to think that any coins with a value under 50 cents are just too small to be bothered using, and so when cleaning out their loose change from around the house will simply throw these smaller coins in the bin. What a waste! Encourage your child to be careful with all denominations of money, and show them how those small coins can add up, by starting a family small coins box. Maybe you could use the money to fund small family outings (a trip to the shop to get ice creams).

3. Money has to be earned.
There are many people in the world these days that don’t seem to have ever learned this lesson. They sit around home and expect handouts so they can live, or turn to a life of crime to fund their existence. Be careful not to give your child money every time he or she asks, without expecting anything in return i.e. completion of household chores.

4. Encourage one-third savings, one-third donations, one-third spending.
The exact proportions in which your child divides their money are up to each individual family to decide, based on their beliefs and the needs of the child. This can quite easily be achieved by providing them with 3 piggy banks or moneyboxes – one for spending, one for saving & one for donating.

5. Avoid borrowing money wherever possible.
It is always much harder to repay money that has been borrowed, than to save your money. Some loans, such as home loans, tend to be unavoidable though. A good rule of thumb is if you don’t have the cash to buy it, you can’t afford it!

6. Money isn’t your best friend so don’t let it control your life.
Quite simply, try not to become so over committed with your finances, that you are forced to work 60 to 70 hours a week to continue the lifestyle. If you do, then you are letting the money control your life. You don’t usually need the fancy car (and car loan) or overseas holiday (and personal loan). All these things are nice, but only if you can easily afford them!

7. Show them how to budget & live within their means
This is one of the most important skills that your child must know, that so many people don’t seem to know how to do. Recent surveys have shown, that many people are spending 10% to 20% above what they earn. They are earning enough money to fund their lifestyle, but they simply aren’t budgeting it, and so are wasting large amounts of money each week.

With these seven lessons under their belt, they will be off to a great start, but there are many more money skills that your child will benefit enormously from learning. To learn more, visit the Kids Money Tips web site.

When, What and How Do You Begin Teaching Your Preschooler

A while back LeeAnn from Las Vegas asked my opinion on just when is the right time to begin teaching her 2-year-old daughter. She has already begun teaching basic concepts such as alphabet, colors, and numbers, but some members of her family feel that she is pushing her little girl.

In my opinion, the easiest way for LeeAnn to test whether or not she is pushing her daughter can be found in this quote: "Is it too soon, or should I let her keep going as long as she is interested and is having fun?"

If LeeAnn's daughter is interested in the concepts that she is learning and having fun while learning then it is definitely the right time to teach her.

Young children are interested in the world around them and they are interested in what their parents know. Building on that interest to teach basic concepts (just as LeeAnn is doing) is not pushing your child -- it is meeting your child's needs. One of the most important things you can do for your child is to offer an environment rich in learning opportunities. If you give your child the opportunity to learn then he will learn -- it really is as simple as that.

Remember, young children are learning a great deal about themselves, their family and caregivers, and their world ever day. For most of those lessons you are the teacher. By the time your child has reached the age of 2 you have already taught hundreds, even thousands, of important lessons about how to function in the world and society. Indeed, many of the everyday activities you perform with your child also have academic implications. For example, the books that you read to your child and the songs you sing with your child have a lasting impact on literacy. It is no great stretch to add other concepts into your repertoire and this can make a great deal of difference in how prepared your child is for preschool and kindergarten.

There are really only three things you should remember:

~ Keep it fun Making learning into a game and your child will always enjoys what you have to teach her.

~ Keep it light Educational products and activities that are actually games are wonderful but don't force your child into spending time each day with flashcards or the like. They'll most likely learn faster and more meaningfully if you have an alphabet scavenger hunt at the supermarket.

~ Embrace the teachable moment but don't schedule lessons and force educational activities on your child. When the opportunity presents itself (and it will countless times in a day!) take advantage and use it for a lesson. For example, simply putting on socks can be a lesson in right and left, colors, or counting!

HOW TO TEACH

So how do you teach your preschooler without scheduling lessons and forcing them to pay attention? You embrace the teachable moment!

What is the teachable moment? It is simply an opportunity that springs out of normal, everyday life or as children become older and more verbal a timely question or comment.

Time when you and your child are in the car, for example, is a wonderful teaching opportunity that many parents overlook. If you are reunited after a day's separation then you can share stories about your day-and in the process work on vocabulary and literacy skills as well as teach your child about the world around them. You can also use cars and trucks to teach colors, road signs to teach shapes, and so on.

Mealtimes are also wonderful teaching opportunities. Counting is easily worked into almost any meal, such as telling a child they can have two cookies or giving them five tater tots. Shapes and colors can also be brought into mealtimes. For example, my son likes to choose the shape for his sandwiches-triangles or squares? As a child grows older you can also do letter sounds with the various foods, such as milk starts with "mmmmh".

WHAT TO TEACH

Skills you should work on with your child fall into eight basic categories, according to early childhood educators:

~ Social/Emotional Skills, which will be the greatest predictors of success in life.

~ Self esteem, which is crucial for all learning.

~ Physical Skills

~ Communication Skills: listening, speaking, singing, drawing, gesturing

~ Basic Concepts such as colors, letters, numbers, vocabulary

~ Categorizing Skills, what is the same and different

~ Compare and Contrast Skills, which is the higher order level of Categorizing

~ Experiences on which to draw. These are perhaps the most important of all, as they provide a frame of reference for future learning. The more experiences from which a child can draw, the better s/he will understand both learning and the world.

These are all literacy skills and they are all key to your child's future success. If you need still more help identifying concepts that your child should master then study the developmental milestones for your child's age at http://PreschoolersLearnMore.com.

So rest easy, LeeAnn, you are doing exactly the right thing for your daughter!

When A Parent Struggles With Fear And Anxiety

What do you do when you struggle with fear and anxiety and you have to maintain the family and kids? It can be tough but there are ways to manage your fears and take care of your family at the same time. Here are some techniques a parent can use to manage his or her anxiety.

The first thing you should do is to get professional help. You owe it to your family and kids to get better. Getting the help you need to battle fear and anxiety is very important and will lead you to the road of recovery. Admitting that you have a problem and getting help is the first step in getting better.

Remember that you are not alone. There are many people who deal with fear and anxiety and they too live normal lives. There is no reason why you can’t get through this. If other parents can manage their fears, so can you. You can do it. There is hope for you.

When taking care of the family, do not try to manage everything all at once. Get your spouse or somebody else to help do some of the work. One person cannot do everything. Share your responsibilities with your spouse if you can. Also learn to communicate with your spouse about who does what on a certain day.

Do not let your anxieties get the best of you. A technique that is very helpful is to have a list of positive statements that make you happy. Whenever you feel anxious and your taking care of the kids, get your list and read those statements.

The next time you become overwhelmed with fear and anxiety, remember that there is hope in overcoming your anxieties and depression. With some help, you will be able to find the answers to your fears. You just have to be patient and determine to get better.